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Keep Your Family From Finding Your ‘Adult Film Collection’ Collection After You Die

Porn disposal service
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What do you think would happen if, upon your departure from this mortal Earth, your family found out that you were an active part of a nipple-biting subculture, or stumbled upon your sizeable Russian horse and prosthetic masturbation porn collection ? We can tell you this – it would definitely change the tone of the eulogy.

For those of you that would rather not have your family discover that before you died you diddled a silicone Sally sex doll and kept a bondage donkey locked in the basement, perhaps you should consider making arrangements with a “Deceased Belongings Clean-Up Service.”

Companies, like Keepers, who specialize in cleaning up all proof of a person’s indiscretions at the time of their death, are becoming quite a hot commodity in Japan. In fact, Keepers owner Taichi Yoshida says that ever since he opened the business in 2000, he has been quite busy keeping the freaky, post-mortem secrets of upstanding Japanese citizens from ever being revealed to their families.

Yoshida says that he has gotten rid of evidence of everything from women’s underwear to proof of mistresses and illegitimate children – all things, he says, that threaten to destroy a person’s public persona.

Unfortunately, we are not aware of any services like this here in the states. So unless you want to be remembered as some sort of sexual deviant, you might want to go ahead and get rid of that high voltage nut clamp and the Salad Tosser 3000 now.

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