The Rock Station 99X » Jesus

Come All Ye Faithful – Pastor With Holy Penis Blesses His Flock

Puff — Fri, 01 Feb 2013 16:37:08 +0000

Well, this is an interesting story. A Brazilian Pastor has been arrested for rape after he convinced the female members of his congregation that his penis had been consecrated with “divine semen of the Holy Spirit” and that the only way to receive God into their lives was through the mouth. Pastor Sobrino Valdeci Picanto [...]

WWJD? Run For President! Jesus in 2012! [VIDEO]

renfield — Mon, 27 Aug 2012 23:01:08 +0000

Times are tough…the economy is in the toilet; we’re caught up in war (excuse me, police actions) all over the world; murder, rape, and child abuse are all over the news… We’re spiraling out of control, and someone needs to step up and take over. Who has the connections, the wisdom, and the experience we [...]

The Most Absurd Place I've Seen Jesus [PIC]

Troy Jones — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 17:24:14 +0000

We’ve all seen the Savior in photos of toast, weeping walls, and jelly donuts, but have you ever seen him here? Click “Read More” to see what I mean.

Jesus to Return on May 27th, Apocalypse to Follow [VIDEO]

gonzo — Mon, 09 Jan 2012 17:22:29 +0000

Ronald Weinland, who considers himself a prophet of God, continues to warn that Jesus Christ is returning on May 27, 2012. (It is so much more fun when they pick an exact date. We can have lots of fun and mock him when Jesus waits until football season to return!) For those who do not [...]

Woman Washes Socks, Finds Jesus

gonzo — Tue, 27 Dec 2011 22:51:07 +0000

According to The Daily Mail, a British woman has discovered a religious relic that could rival the Shroud of Turin for its significance to Christianity.

While theologians and scientists continue to debate the authenticity of the shroud - the ancient cloth believed to have been wrapped around the body of the Messiah and which now bears his image - another piece of fabric mysteriously imprinted with the image of Jesus has been unearthed - on a washing line in Kent.

Santa Meet Jesus….Jesus Meet Santa

Steve King — Sat, 24 Dec 2011 16:34:00 +0000

Ah, the classic good versus evil…the man in Red vs. the man in White in a rap battle like none other. Had Santa and Jesus both come from the streets, an Eminen/Kid Rock meets Michael Jackson (via Bad) would then ensue, as we you will see in the video below. The part, I think we [...]

Jesus Wants Tebow to Take it Down a Notch [VIDEO]

gonzo — Sun, 18 Dec 2011 09:14:16 +0000

What? And you thought Tim Tebow was the reason Denver has been winning. Get the real scoop from this clip from this week's SNL. Who knew Jesus wore tube socks???