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Melvins’ King Buzzo Fires Back at ‘A–hole Kiss Know-It-Alls’

King Buzzo of the Melvins
Ipecac Records

As anyone who’s ever been in the band has quickly discovered, the world of Kiss is not for the faint of heart. It’s a good thing, then, that Melvins frontman King Buzzo has just the sort of hardy constitution required to withstand the flames of internet rage unleashed by his recent comments regarding the ever-contentious absence of original members Ace Frehley and Peter Criss from the current lineup.

Buzzo, a devout Kiss fan, referred during a recent interview to Frehley and Criss as “f–ed-up alcoholic junkie guys” who’d cost themselves their own place in Kisstory. Unsurprisingly, his comments generated a fair amount of backlash among those who feel the duo should still be in the band. And although Buzzo made it clear he’d only said what he said because the interviewer asked him what he thought, he isn’t backing down.

“Are Kiss fans really stupid enough believe those two never got loaded?” he asked during a tour diary post published between recent shows. “I mean, in two seconds of an internet search I’d found Gene [Simmons] on YouTube talking all about the two of them getting f—ed up all through the Kiss golden years and in fact he even talks about those guys not even playing on tracks of albums like ‘Destroyer’ because of their f—ed up behavior. In order to get the job done, the sober members of Kiss were FORCED to hire studio hacks… In the ’70s.”

Furthermore, added Buzzo, all the Kiss fans throwing insults about his appearance should remember that the band they’re defending spent years hiding their own faces from public view. “The most hilarious part is they also, in their posts go on and on and ON about how I look! Apparently I’m a fat, stupid, Side Show Bob looking freak that none of them have ever heard of who has no right to talk s— about Ace and Peter,” he shrugged. “Ace and Peter, two grown men who made a fortune wearing Kabuki make up as a result of being even uglier than I am. You know why they wore make up? Because they needed it! Obviously without make up those two wouldn’t have made s—.”

The moral of the story? “For the record, you Kiss fan f—heads who are giving ME s— for saying as it turns out, the exact same thing as Gene can KISS my ass! Haven’t any of you a–hole Kiss know-it-alls looked into this or do you just not believe Gene?”

Next: Top 10 Melvins Classic Rock Covers

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