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Latest and Greatest Charlie “Sheen-isms”

Charlie Sheen
Photo by Riccardo S. Savi/Getty Images

To save you the time of watching all the videos of the interviews that Charlie Sheen has done lately, here is a list from Pop Eater of what I’m calling “Sheen-isms.”  So far my favorite has to be this charming line: “I am on a drug, it’s called ‘Charlie Sheen.’ It’s not available ’cause if you try it once you will die. Your face will melt off, and children will weep over your exploded body.”

►”I’m on a quest to claim absolute victory on every front.”

►”I’m proud of what I created. Why wouldn’t I be? I exposed people to magic. I exposed them to something that they otherwise would not see in their boring normal lives. And I gave that to them!”

►”Dying is for fools. Amateurs.”

►”Resentments are the rocket fuel that lives in the tip of my saber.”

►”[I was] bangin’ 7-gram rocks and finishing them because that’s how I roll. I have one speed, one gear … go!”

►”I mean, what’s not to love? Especially when you see how I party. Man, it was epic. The run I was on made Sinatra, Flynn, Jagger, Richards all of ‘em just look like droopy-eyed armless children.”

►”What’s the cure, medicine to make me like them? Not gonna happen. I’m bi-winning. I win here, I win there. Now what? If I’m bipolar, aren’t there moments when a guy like crashes?”

►”You borrow my brain for five seconds and just be like ‘Dude, can’t handle it! Unplug this bastard!’ … It fires in a way that is perhaps not from this terrestrial realm.”

►”I’ve got magic. I’ve got poetry at my fingertips.”

►”I wanted to watch ‘Jaws’ on the ocean in the dark and be afraid.”

►”It’s been a tsunami. And I’ve been riding it on a mercury surfboard.”

►”I’m still alive, which is pretty cool.”

What’s your favorite Sheen-ism?

Pop Eater

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