The joke goes, “take my wife… PLEASE” but this Craigslist posting from a die-hard Kentucky Wildcats fan who describes himself as a pimp is no joke.

The ad starts off innocently enough with the title suggesting the owner is putting either a movie theater, or a structure for pets to play on, up for sale. But, it turns out this dude is dying to get to New Orleans to watch his Wildcats play and he doesn’t mind using his ‘one and only’ as collateral.

Then, it gets weird. As if answering the obvious unasked question, “Why your wife?”, he claims he’s “not feeling his best”. Is he under the weather? Does he not get sick pay?

He goes on to state she’s ‘completely game’ but is ‘a little picky’ BUT if you can make her ‘howl at the moon’ it’s a deal? So, even if she’s not into you at first glance, if you can overcome to the initial turn-off and get her to orgasm – which is super easy, btw – then our certified pimp will get the tickets.

Even though we have them facing Kansas in the finals, we’re almost rooting for the Wildcats to lose against Louisville so this a-hole has to live with his wife eventually leaving him for some dude who made her orgasm for tickets.

Our first reaction? Pics, please!

Screenshot and full text are below…

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I am a UK fan wanting to go to the Final Four in N’Oleans. I have put up my wife as collateral. She can make you speak 5 languages you never knew you could speak. I am not feeling my best so I have to use my sexy mama to get me to the game.
She is completely game, is a litte picky, but if you make her howl at the moon while making her speak portugese or something I don’t get out of her then by all means…..have at it and let me see my UK Wildcats!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yes it is bad to do this, but it the Kentucky faithful dammit. Look out for the Bluegrass State and hook this pimp up okay?

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