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Stupid Criminals

Stupid Criminals

Channel 2 Action News
Channel 2 Action News
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Dumbest Criminal Ever Robs Store With Cop Standing Right Behind Him [VIDEO]

Here’s a little pro tip for those of you planning on holding up a convenience store: make sure a cop isn’t standing right behind you. Otherwise you’ll look like an idiot like the criminal in this video.

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Iowa City Police Department
Iowa City Police Department
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Woman Assaults Boyfriend For Not Having Sex

An Iowa woman was arrested for assaulting her boyfriend after he refused to have sex with her. The Press Citizen explains that Melissa Barbara Minarsich, 28, just needed a little sweet loving and wanted to make that incredibly clear to her boyfriend.

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Pinellas County Sheriffs Department
Pinellas County Sheriffs Department
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Woman Claiming to Be Vampire Bites Senior Citizen

Josephine Smith wasn’t kidding when she approached 69-year-old Milton Ellis Wednesday night in the parking lot of a shuttered St. Petersburg, Florida Hooters and declared “I’m a vampire, I am going to eat you.”

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Getty Images
Getty Images
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Pot Luck! Bystanders Grab Weed Dropped By Crashed Truck

Do you know the way to San Jose? No seriously, do you, because there is free weed on the street but it’s not going to last very long.

The Mercury News explains that a truck, illegally carrying marijuana, crashed and ended up on its side sending large bags of pot throughout the intersection. The driver hightailed it out of sight and that’s when the real fun started.

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ABC News
ABC News
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Man Stuffs $4,000 Worth of Snakes in His Pants [VIDEO]

Yup, those really were snakes in Eric Fiegel’s pocket.

Security cameras at Mesa, Arizona’s Predators Reptile Center caught the 22-year-old stuffing five $800 baby sharp albino boa constrictors into his shorts, and then leaving the premises.

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YouTube
YouTube
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Polish Spiderman Impersonator More Supervillain than Superhero [VIDEO]

What if, instead of being bitten by a radioactive spider that gave him superhuman abilities, Spiderman was just some regular powerless guy who dressed up in a red and blue costume with silly string cans? Of course, since he wouldn’t be able to fight crime, he would have to wreak havoc on the unassuming citizenry.

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YouTube
YouTube
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Pantie-Headed Bandit Strikes in Dallas [VIDEO]

In what appears to be a combination of crime and fetish fantasy, a man in Dallas, Texas robbed an Exxon TigerMart while wearing a floral dress, white boots and with a pair of panties obscuring his face.

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Travis Keen Walmart
Photos Opso.com and Flickr
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Monroe Man Arrested While Driving Around Walmart Parking Lot

People either love or hate Walmart. Travis Keen of Monroe LOVES Walmart!

On Tuesday, Keen was seen driving a white Taurus around the Walmart parking lot in Monroe. Ouachita Sheriffs were called after several witnesses had reported that he was driving around with his penis exposed.

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Michael-Todd_Coheed-and-Cambria_photo-by-Ethan-Miller_Getty-Images-300x232
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Coheed and Cambria Bassist Michael Todd Leaves Band Following Arrest

CBS
CBS
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Thief Driving Backhoe Smashes Through an ATM – Watch the Incredible Video

In Pine Prairie, Louisiana, a thief attempted to rob an ATM on Monday by breaking it open with a piece of heavy construction equipment, ‘The Early Show’ reports — and the incident was caught on the store’s security camera.

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Photo by Dave Hogan/Getty Images
Photo by Dave Hogan/Getty Images
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Will Terrorists Start Planting Explosives in Breast Implants?

When you're at an airport, keep an eye out for people acting suspicious. You'll know them by their nervous glances, heavy breathing, and GARGANTUAN BREASTS.

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Photo by Red Huber-Pool/Getty Images
Photo by Red Huber-Pool/Getty Images
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Casey Anthony is Found Not Guilty of the Murder of Her Two-Year-Old Daughter . . . Here are the 10 Things You Need to Know

Yesterday, after only two days of deliberating, the jury in the CASEY ANTHONY trial came back with their verdict. And it shocked most legal experts. They found her NOT GUILTY of murdering her two-year-old daughter.

Here are the 10 things you need to know to be fully caught up on the case.

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